Merle Jordan writes about standing on the edge of the ocean and watching a young man and an older man row a small boat out to a larger one that was anchored at some distance from the shore. The older man climbed aboard, went to the wheel of the large boat, and brought its engine to life.

It was the young sailor's job to hoist the anchor. Struggling with the heavy, dead weight was no easy thing for him. However it was clear the boat was not about to move forward on its charted course until the anchor had been hauled aboard.

Merle Jordan uses that episode as a metaphor for his book which he titles "Reclaiming Your Story". He writes: "We are all anchored in the personal histories we inherit from a family of origin . . . Our maps of reality; images of God; values, beliefs, and meaning systems; patterns of relating, communicating, and interacting; sense of identity and self-worth; and emotional awareness and means of expression are largely determined by our relationships and experiences in our families of origin."

To me, this seems to be an extremely accurate assessment! Haven't you seen it play out in the life of someone you know? An abused child rarely learns to trust as an adult. Boys molested by men are often aggressive as an antidote to feeling weak or afraid. Traumatized children frequently over-react to upsetting things with rage and horror. People who grow up with alcohol, violence, or abandonment issues even tend to choose mates and business partners who have the same traits. After all, they can relate to them.

The Christian faith is about transformation. "If anyone is in Christ," said Paul, "he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!" (2Corinthians 5:17). But some people never experience the new life Christ has made possible for them. And often it isn't their fault. They don't realize they are repeating history from their families of origin or from their early life experiences. No one has helped them fathom that those early experiences have them stuck in emotional cement.

Friend, if you have children, it is important that you look for and interrupt any unhealthy patterns in your family history. You don't want to pass them on to future generations. Your leadership in business, community, or church will be enhanced through an awareness of how these dynamics work. By taking this step, you can become the catalyst for helping others find emotional and spiritual health.

For many of us, we sometimes need the help of others to pull up our anchors to the past in order to move forward on the journey God has in mind for us. So my encouragement to you today, is that you might be brave and cut loose from whatever dead weight may be holding you back from being a whole and complete person!

Finally, permit me to ask you some personal questions. Are you hurting emotionally? Do you live day by day with a nagging memory that seems to be tearing at your soul? Are you troubled with a constant and all-pervading feeling that you are never "good enough"? If your answer is yes to any of these questions, we'd like to send you an insightful booklet that will tell you how you can break the destructive chains that hold you to your past and how you can be freed permanently from inner turmoil and damaged feelings. The booklet is titled "LETTING GO OF PAINFUL MEMORIES" and it is yours FREE for the asking. To receive your complimentary copy, simply write to Discovering A BETTER LIFE, P.O. Box 1540, Albany WA 6331. You may also Telephone your request on: 98 418 418, or Email us at: abl-alb@omninet.net.au